Mama didn’t tell me…

I grew up an only child and therefore missed out on a lot of the dynamics you find in a large family. Well, I’m not missing out anymore. But here is a short list of the things my mom neglected to mention. Partly because she’d forgotten; partly because I’m sure I wouldn’t have listened in the first place.

Siblings will fight 24/7 about nothing in particular if you let them.

Children’s voices have the knack of making a grown woman cry if they hit a certain pitch. Especially if the woman has a headache to begin with.

Male children are just as emotional — and sometimes more so — than female children.

While teen girls get bitchy one week a month, boys can lose it whenever they want. There is little or no warning. No chance to prepare and seek shelter.

When one child is gone — no matter which child — the noise level is reduced in half; the number of fights reduced by 1/3; boredom level rises by 1/5.

When all else fails, bribe them for some peace a quiet. You know you will, so let’s make it ‘legal’, shall we?

Having more than one child is an adventure. Having more than three is a zoo. Good thing I like zoos. 😉

You will love your children more than anything; you will never, ever stop being their mother; you will never stop worrying about them.

You will forever be known as so-and-so’s mom. And honestly, that’s not such a bad identity to have. 😉

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